A fairytale, a love story,
A person, a sweet memory,
A life I want, I want to be alive,
So into the dream world I dive!
She is a dreamer, a day dreamer. She day-dreams at night too! She sleeps not, because she is planning. She is working out a way to live the life she wants. A dream, no one would have dared to dream, she dreams wide awake. Her thoughts wander away, in lands unknown, in places wanting to be seen. Those worlds beg for her presence and she giggles as she knows who she is. She smiles away her past and pushes those memories far. She is a new girl, with a new dream, with a much newer, better life waiting for her. She is strong enough to conquer her fears, conquer her emotions. She is strong enough to break all chains, boundaries and set herself free, before her soul leaves her body. She knows she has to do this and so she is still alive. Her dream is a reason to live, her dream is what she will live, and so she is still awake. Wide eyed in the middle of the night, planning and thinking and dreaming and wondering, her sheer imaginations, in her eyes, sparkling bright!
Her hands pained no more. She held the knife tight in her hands, and her fingers bled. She was about to do something she should not be doing. She was committing a sin. She was killing herself, her dream. She was taking away a beautiful life of a beautiful girl, which God had made for her. God had blessed her with life, but she was not ready for it. Her eyes were red and swollen, her skin twitching every inch. Her skull was exploding with pain, and the rest of her body was numbed. Her temples overly exposed the stressed nerves and sweat trickled down them. She cried no more, but looked into the space without looking. Something stopped her, held her there. Her life was not ready to leave her. She was not strong enough to commit a sin so bad!
You would not do it if you were strong.
A small voice in her head whispered.
You have a dream, your ego, and your soulful life. You can live that dream, you can live your imagination, you fearless stubborn girl!
The voice continued. But she was bothered; she was bothered with some flashes of memories, those visions in front of her. The hateful faces, the loveless people, drained all energy out. She gritted her teeth and groaned with pain, as chills ran down her spine. The numbness left her skin. And she felt her hands wet with blood. She pulled up the knife to her wrist. I hate seeing blood. I hate anything vulnerable. I am a warrior. I will fight to live this life. I have a DREAM. I am egoistic enough to live my dream before my soul leaves. I am not weak. And the knife fell from her clasp, with a dull clink on the ground, now a pool of red. She flinched at the sight. She was dizzy. She had to cry, to let her tears out.
So she did.
The whole night.
But she lived.
And she lived her dream too….
By Kashaf Shaikh FROM AWORDWARRIORSBLOG